How to stop overthinking

Overthinking can feel like a mental hamster wheel—spinning endlessly without getting anywhere. In this article, we explore practical, science-backed strategies to break the cycle of rumination. From setting mental boundaries to practicing mindfulness and reframing negative thoughts, learn how to quiet your mind and regain control. Whether you’re stuck in “what ifs” or replaying conversations, it’s time to stop overthinking and start living.

For a brief moment, imagine a time in your life when you’ve had to make a big decision. A decision that you knew would create a ripple effect in other areas of your life that could have both positive and negative outcomes. At some time, you might have even taken additional time to reflect on every possible scenario so that it creates the least amount of harm and the largest amount of good (for yourself and/or others). As the deadline to make the decision approaches, your heart begins to race, and your mind becomes consumed with an ethical dilemma that you feel could change the course of your life. Finally, when the moment comes and you go with your gut instinct, you make the decision, and then suddenly something happens.

The overthinking begins. ….Did I make the right decision? Am I going to regret what I’ve done? Will my friends or family disagree with my choice? Am I being selfish? Do I have the chance to take my decision back if it turns out worse than I imagined? And the list goes on…

If you’ve experienced overthinking in similar scenarios, then congratulations… you’re human! Overthinking is a normal part of our cognitive processes, and it is also rooted in our physiology. The fear, anger, and anxiety that sit behind the overthinking have been shown to trigger our sympathetic nervous system, which can put us into ‘fight or flight’ mode (Hall et al., 2023). Our body perceives a threat and prepares itself to react. However, the ‘threat’ of overthinking is an invisible enemy within us, which can sometimes feed further into overthinking – there’s nothing there to physically stop except ourselves.

The most obvious answer is to tell yourself to stop overthinking or distract your mind. However, what these methods fail to do is the opposite of what might be helpful, and it can often feed into the anxious and fearful thinking we’re experiencing. Telling yourself not to overthink is about as helpful as telling yourself not to breathe – it doesn’t work, and it’s not sustainable. Your mind and body are providing you with clues to experience the discomfort in the moment. So, how could you take this forward?

Four Steps

Step 1: Remind yourself that as a human, you experience a wide range of emotions (not just happiness – we often put too much pressure on being happy all the time). Therefore, accepting the discomfort of the moment versus trying to suppress it is half the battle. Trying to ignore the feelings that come with it might cause more overthinking.

Step 2: Take a moment to ground yourself by closing your eyes and practicing deep breathing exercises. This can stop you from feeling as if you need to make immediate decisions or that your body is in danger. It gives you a moment to slow down and bring you to the present. This also activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to relax and ‘rest and digest’.

Step 3: Begin to explore ways in which you have more power over your thoughts. Some of these methods include distinguishing between what the likely and unlikely outcomes are, using your values as a roadmap, thoughts diffusion techniques, meditations, accepting that every decision involves loss and compromise, or creating perspective on the decision (e.g., will this decision matter in a week, a month, a year?).

Step 4: When all else fails, then sometimes simply speaking with someone you trust and feel comfortable with can be just as effective.

The next time you find yourself overthinking, it might be worth considering that this evolutionary adaptation might be trying to tell your body something. Instead of potentially inducing more anxiety by fighting the feelings, it might just be worth allowing yourself the permission to feel those emotions, taking some deep breaths to ground yourself in the present, and then slowing down to see which options you have to gain power over it.

Remember: your thoughts are simply that… thoughts!

References:

Karlee Jenna Hall, Karen Van Ooteghem, & McIlroy, W. E. (2023). Emotional state as a modulator of autonomic and somatic nervous system activity in postural control: a review. Frontiers in Neurology, 14. https://doi.org/10.3389/fneur.2023.1188799

Related link:

https://teladochealth.org.uk/our-services/mental-health/‌